Every day I get so frustrated & angry at the neighbor around the corner. Older man, but by no means frail or disabled. Practically every day he goes down to the grocery store & comes walking back up the street with a shopping cart, usually with only one small bag. In my mind I'm thinking "Gosh dang it, buy a little personal rolling cart" or "What the heck?! Why can't you just carry your stupid bag!" Of course, as time has passed, every time I see him, even when he isn't pushing that shopping cart I want to roll my eyes as I pass. Being brought up with manners, I roll them on the inside, but smile on the outside-that vague "I don't really know you, lemme plaster a fake smile on so I don't show how rude I really want to be right now" kind of look. Some days he smiles back, but most he just stares blankly at me. Which, in turn, makes my smile that much faker.
Even today I saw the shopping cart collector drive up to the usual spot, pick up his cart, and quickly leave. My very 1st thought was "Gee, wonder what that's costing ME, the consumer, every time they have to pay this guy to get that lazy bum's cart."
Fast forward 10 minutes. I hear sirens coming up my street, and stop in front of my Grandpa's, which is next door to me. Instantly my heart is racing-is Grandpa ok? I can't see the man laying on the ground because my view was blocked. So I go over quickly & see this man laying on the sidewalk. My cousin tells me he saw our neighbor fall straight on the ground during a seizure. He called 911 immediately, and thus begins my humble reminder that I don't get to judge any more than I want others to judge me.
As the EMT's are assessing this man, it turns out that he has Alzheimer's, Dementia, and high blood pressure. He is rarely coherent of his surroundings in the 1st place, and now, this poor man is being asked to lay on a gurney, strapped down, and be taken away. He begins to cry out in Spanish that he doesn't want to go, and I hear the police officer reassure him that he is not in Mexico, and that he is safe here in America. This reassures him for a second, and then he begins to cry out for his mother.
I was just about in tears at this point. This poor man. And his wife, standing there trying to comfort him but knowing that it does no good, as he isn't responsive to her as well. Her aloofness signals to me that he probably slips into a place she isn't at, and there is a sadness in her eyes as she tells the police his conditions, and what causes him to be so against the obvious care he needs.
As they strapped him down, she chose to go home and gather a few things to meet them at the hospital, she looked up and thanked Justin for calling. I wished there was more to do to help her, but I know she has family in the area.
Then I walked away, and the only thing I could think, was how could I possibly have judged this man. I didn't know his story. I always try to teach my kids to look at the other side of things. Play the devil's advocate, and never make a choice based on assumptions. Seek out facts, and when you don't know them, be kind respectful and caring to those around you. Life is too short to go around deciding things when you don't even know what it is you're deciding on. Now to absorb this into my daily life again. I hate when an example is made from someone, but I view this as an eye opener to how easily judgments slip through those cracks in our minds. It's easy to be open minded about the big topics-race, sex, orientation, ageism. It's those little things-like this guy & his cart, that find their way in & erode the heart.
The man seems like he's going to be okay, for now. When I see him again, all I can hope is that he is pushing that cart up our street. Because that means he's having a good day.
