The Silver Lining To My Hospital Stay

This past week has been interesting, to say the least. It all starts back about 2 weeks ago. I caught whatever bug was going around. Normal annoying symptoms-starting with the flu then seeming to progress into a really bad cold. I called the nurses station at Kaiser San Diego when I first got the temperature, and they gave me the information for pregnant treatment. I did everything they said to do. It didn't get better, so then I scheduled an appointment with my general practitioner. He gave me essentially the same information. I started noticing my weight dropping, and when I went into my prenatal appointment I had officially lost 5 pounds. Nobody seemed to worry much, but I kept telling everyone that I hadn't been able to keep any food or fluids down. Still no seem to worry. I told them that Thomas wasn't as active as he usually was. Still no cause for concern-they chalked that up to less room in there to squirm. I kept having that nagging feeling though.

Still, by Tuesday, I had no appetite, I'd lost 10 pounds, and I'd thrown up water one too many times. I called the triage nurse in San Diego one more time. At first they seemed apprehensive to even really listen to me. When I told her about the 10 pounds, she tried to correct me & say that it'd only been 5. I told her that since my Friday apt. I'd lost another 5 pounds. Finally, with a hint of aggravated annoyance in her voice, the nurse advised me to come to San Diego triage to be checked out.

Needless to say, I was severely dehydrated, and the baby's amniotic fluid was really low. I had elevated liver enzymes, which they could never figure out, a virus that needed antibiotics, and a myriad of other complications that needed to be addressed through medicine & obsvervation. I knew things weren't right, yet it wasn't until I really started making a stink that they listened to me.

Luckily Thomas was ok through it all, and after they hydrated me he started back to his usual self-flipping, kicking, squirming & generally being himself. They had to take a few ultrasounds, and he was his same ornery self! In fact, when the lab tech tried to get a good picture for me to keep, he kept throwing his arm up in front of the picture!

Finally on Saturday morning they told me that, although my liver enzymes are still high, they're going down. I was put on a thousand different meds for at home, and I'm still on high alert as far as exposure to anyone really goes. aka, no hugs & kisses from the kids and no baseball games for the next week :(

I was extremely lucky to have the help of Steve, my Aunt Diana, and my friend, Kathy. Without them, I don't think this week would have been able to happen. Finally, that age old question "what exactly do you do all day" was answered for Steve! His was sprinkled with 45 minute one way drives to the hospital, too, but he saw what a hectic lifestyle we have going on here. Not to say I'd ever want to repeat the week, but I think it was nice to get a little boost in appreciation from him for the work I put forth :)

On to my silver lining-I really got to spend some one on one time with this little peanut baking in here. I was monitored regularly, got many ultrasounds, and once I started feeling better, was able to focus on my pregnancy and what it's like. Knowing that this is my last pregnancy, to be able to have that opportunity to enjoy the little movements, and that time that is secret & special to the two of us. Don't get me wrong-I'm totally ready to pop this little guy out, but I appreciate the kicks, squirms, and hickups too!

I'm including the picture that the lab tech was finally able to get. It was so different seeing Thomas' face so personally-those 20 week scans all look basically the same. I want to say thank you to everyone who was praying for us during the time, and tell you that we really appreciated all the support we got during my stay there.

I'd say I'm 90% back to myself-which is good, because these next few weeks are going to be HECTIC w/baseball, school ending, and a special little girl's 8th birthday!

Mother's Day

Yesterday was a nice time with Steve, Andrew, & Hannah. Besides a few breakdowns by my hormonal crying :) I have been ultra sensitive this week over nothing!

The kids gave me their presents, which, of course, were great! I love homemade gifts! Andrew made a pop up card and Hannah made 3 blocks that spell out MOM. She also gave me a paper with a secret code that I have decipher.

After breakfast & presents, we did a drive down to the San Diego hospital that I will deliver at if I go into labor before June 2nd. I loved the hospital! The staff was really nice, and a nurse took us on an unofficial tour to quite a few of the rooms to show us what it will be like if we're there. It makes me sad in a way that I only have 3 more weeks before I can go down to Palomar Hospital in Escondido! Reality, of course, is that I'd rather do the short 20 minute drive over the hour one, but STILL, the room was great, and I really liked all of the staff there. We have a tour of Escondido hospital next Saturday, so we can make the final decision then-that is, of course, if Thomas comes after 36 weeks!

Steve was definitely shocked by the rooms-I asked him afterward & he said that he expected it to be more sterile or stainless steel or something. He was impressed by the drop down delivery bed, and the fact that everything was encompassed into one room. Seeing his face when he saw the little baby weigh/monitoring station was priceless. We found out that when I go in for my tubal ligation, Steve will be with the baby by himself for the whole time-I think I saw a glimmer of terror which he quickly hid when he saw me looking at him! We didn't get to see the rooming area, where I'll be staying afterwards, but she said there's a possibility we'll be sharing a room with someone else. I definitely hope it's a slow week!

After the hospital, we went over to the cemetery that some of my family is buried at. My Grandma Linda was buried there, along with her mother, father, and one of her brothers. Also, one of her sister's ashes were scattered over all of the graves there. We laid flowers on my Grandma's and Great Grandma's grave, and walked around looking at how many graves were from people born in the 1800's. There were quite a few. In fact, we found one family born in the 1820's. As awkward as it sounds, the kids really enjoyed being there. I think Hannah got to have a little bit more of a connection to her Great Grandma, since she was born after my Grandma had passed away.

After going to the cemetery, we took the kids to Dave & Busters. We ate lots of yummy food & played some games. Hannah won 350 tickets altogether from $10 worth of play. 119 tickets were from playing "Deal Or No Deal" by taking the "deal."Unfortunately, she held the case with 200 tickets! She didn't mind though, because the other case left over was only 30 tickets, so she figured she wouldn't be greedy with it! Andrew & Steve played all the shoot 'em up, run 'em over games. Andrew played a few games for tickets, and tried to convince Hannah to combine tickets to both get something better! Needless to say, he didn't get to, despite his pouting, and Hannah got a nice little bracelet, while Andrew got some Chinese Finger Traps!

It was a great weekend, and a wonderful Mother's Day. I can't imagine a better little family if I tried!

Our Trip To Santa Maria

I didn't think we'd get another good family trip in before Thomas arrived, but was pleasantly surprised by this semi-last minute drive to visit Steve's Grandma Marie in Santa Maria. I've been on a trip up there before, but this was the first time the kids got to see a piece of Steve's childhood. We drove past his old house, places he went to school, "his" restaurant that he loved, and to the 2 best parks I have ever seen in my life! We visited with his Aunt Ida & Grandma Marie, and took his Grandma out to lunch, & then down to the beach. The kids got to climb the trees that Steve & his brother built tree forts in, and see pictures of him at their ages. I was so glad we got to go, and see another layer of Steve come out as he shared his special memories with us. We ended up taking over 50 pictures, so I'll have to weed through them to post some of my favorites (any time they're in a picture, it's a great one for me!)

Words can't describe what it feels like to watch them explore the world together.

They didn't even fight when I stuck them together for a nice picture!

Steve & his Grandma.

Poker, a crazed look in her eye, chasing squirrels at the park.

Poker didn't know what to do when the squirrel shot up the tree-she's used to ground squirrels!

A little pond in the park. One of a few.

Ok, this is more like our family!

I couldn't even fit the whole tree in the picture!

32 weeks & 5 days!

Tree root jail-can I keep them there?!

Duck, duck......GOOSE!

And We Never Even Noticed

It's universal, really. A mother's love & protection. Dads do it too, I know, but there's something unique about the way a mother protects her young. They're ever thinking, always scanning the horizon, and always aware of exactly where they can spot the kids, even when they're not directly at her side. Constantly looking at every scenario & plotting out the worst possible ending, then deciding with quick wit how to prevent it from happening. I'm not talking about overbearing, wringing of the hands, keeping their kids Ralph Lauren spotless at all costs, though I know they exist too-but those real, down to earth moms. Let the kids get dirty, but evaluate the situation to see if the worst possible outcome is bad enough to prevent the kids from slinging the mud.

Today I was driving through the small alley up towards my house. It only allows access to one car at a time, and anyone walking along is forced to scoot over to a very small dirt path while the vehicle passes. As I was driving, there was a woman and her small child, and as I approached, I noticed her switching spots with her son. She was now the one closest to my car, and without a second thought, she had moved him away from my vehicle.

My speed was slow, I was in control of my car, and I slowed down even more as I approached. Yet, like a mother only would do, she moved herself into a possibly hazardous situation to protect her son.

How many times in our lives did our mother do this for us? Not just cars in slow alleyways, but in every day little things. How many scenarios ran through their heads? How many millions of ways did they see an arm breaking or a broken back, or worse yet, the unimaginable? How many times did we get frustrated, stomping or pouting-just knowing that our mothers were being meanies? How many times did it pass through us like a breeze, not realizing that in those small gestures, our mothers were risking their own lives for us.

Not that I feel every situation is life or death-but really-do we expect the unexpected?

It's not until we, ourselves, become mothers, that we realize just how many times our own lives were scanned, evaluated, and remedied in case of the unimaginable.

Grandma's, Grandpa's, and Puppy Love!

This past weekend we got to visit with Steve's Mom & Step-Dad. It was a really nice, relaxing visit, and we really enjoyed having them over. Andrew & Hannah had a half weekend with us, so the kids got to come home after Andrew's game (which, of course, his team won again). Also, Vickie brought 2 of her dogs-Justice & Austin. Hannah & Roxy both were having such a great time with Austin. Roxy spent the entire visit wrestling around with him, and Hannah was always trying to walk him around w/his leash. She even begged for him to be able to sleep in her room-which also entailed her speed demon like cleaning abilities when it meant he would be able to be in there if the room was clean! She was upset when she found out he would still have to sleep in his crate, but realized very quickly why he had to stay in his crate. He absolutely loves pulling every single stuffed animal & barbie she owned out of her container & into the living room for a puppy snack!

All in all, it was a really great weekend, and it was nice to be able to really relax & take it slowly. Sometimes we're in such a rush to get so much accomplished on the weekends, or we're out doing stuff that leaves us happy but exhausted, that we don't really have a chance to recharge our batteries.

Here's some pictures from the visit:

They look so vicious when they're having fun!

Poker, being the referee as always!


Austin loved biting at Roxy's opened mouth.

Hannah being our little puppy!

Look at that gaping grin! :)

Ok ok ok, here's some pictures!!!

This is from November-back when I was 10 weeks pregnant. A.K.A. "Forever ago"

And now, at 30 weeks. I'm pretty sure he's transverse still, and all the way up at the top.
Again, 30 weeks
One more 30 week for good measure!
Here's Andrew as a full fledged White Sox ball player~funny to think just last year we were anti-White Sox, pro-Angels :)~
This is from Andrew's birthday at Rock-N-Bowl. 10pm-1am nonstop bowling.
Hannah, at the beginning of Rock-N-Bowl

I really like this picture of Steve!

Hannah by 11:15. Routine definitely suits her!

Another update

So, Thomas is getting really squished in his little habitat. He gets really mad at me if I lay, sit, stand or, do anything that prevents him from getting a full stretch in at his beck & call :) Also, the doctor has me doing this kick count chart, where I count 10 kicks within an hour period. It's really kind of pointless, because I feel him kick/squirm/hickup/stretch/jab/poke/prod/(getting the point?) at me CONSTANTLY. His favorite playtime seems to be 4 am. Which is great, because after I turn, squirm, use the "facilities" a million times, and FINALLY get comfortable-around 3, he's like "OOOH-the playground is OPEN!!" Hmm. Wonder what midnight feedings are going to be like.

I think Steve's starting to get a little more nervous (Shh, don't tell him I told you, he'll deny-it I'm sure). I mean, 10 more weeks-who wouldn't be? I'm nervous too, but I think this time around, it really is more about making sure that the schedule fits. I know, I know, I was one who scoffed at women who tried to "schedule" the birth into their hectic lives. Lord knows, I'm gonna be that girl begging them to figure out a way to stop labor if it's before the 17th! The nurses will quietly giggle & make fun at me too, I'm sure. Really, though. Andrew has an end of the year blowout celebrating their transition from the "little kid's school" (my words-not his!) at the beach. Hannah gets her first field trip to the Wave Waterpark for school. Should Thomas come before that, chances are, they're going to miss this stuff. It really isn't fair now, is it? So see-the scoffer has a reason to become the scoffee!

On side notes-Andrew got to do a hitting clinic for baseball. I was fortunate enough to join the last 1/2 hour of the 2nd day. The guy was REALLY good. I think Andrew gained a lot from it, and will be able to take it with him for the rest of his life-if he can remember it, the stinkin' preteen! We got done with the clinic, went to a scrimmage, and already he was forgetting what he learned. It wasn't till the game was over that he was like "oh yeah-I completely forgot to do what he said huh huh huh" <---that's a dopish laugh by the way :)

We had a great Easter Vacation. Spent a lot of time hanging out with a good friend, and got to see the kids go to their friends houses. Each kid got a special day with me. Little bit of summer clothes shopping, little bit of household stuff shopping, and a great lunch. It was really nice to reconnect with both of them again, as individuals. Knowing that it'll be a while before we get to do that again made it even more special.

Hmm. I think that about sums it up. Steve's and my life are right about where they were last posting.

Catch 22

Well, the good news is, Thomas is officially being felt by people outside of myself. Which means, of course, that his kicking is getting extremely uncomfortable! Steve finally felt him on Wednesday night for the first time, and Hannah felt him Tuesday night. Both knew instantly that it was Thomas and not my breathing. Andrew isn't patient enough-so he has yet to really feel him.

No feet in the ribs yet, but he's definitely losing space in there. 3 more months! Another catch 22-my little girl will then be 8. Hmm. How do I get Thomas to be born, but keep Hannah little?

Randomness Update

Well, Hannah superseded her original cookie goal. She officially sold her 300th box to Andrew last night! She had 299 and Andrew said "There is no way I'm going to walk around for one box-I'll buy it!!" So we've delivered the first "round" and are working on round 2. With any luck we'll have round 2 completely delivered by Thursday, and then on to a short round three. Which is just some lose strings around our neighborhood of people that saw us with our wagon. Plus Steve's softball team-a group of "cookie oriented" men bought enough to feed a small island of people for a year! So her prizes now will include elephant slippers, a hippie lunchbox, a stuffed elephant, a charm bracelet, a t-shirt, an elephant piggy bank, and the participation badge, along with 3 extra hippie charms to go with the bracelet. We will not be going for the beach towel at 350 boxes! :)


Andrew's baseball team is annihilating the competition! They have yet to lose a game by less than 10 points. The mercy rule was put there for these guys! Probably helps that 2 of the boys on the team are taller than me-and one of them has the faint shading of a mustache! Andrew hasn't seen a lot of action yet-which coach was honest and upfront about from the beginning. He said he gives seniority to players from his previous years-but that it doesn't mean it won't even out in the end. Andrew is faring decently at bat. I've noticed that older doesn't mean more accurate-the boys may throw the ball REALLY hard, but it isn't very accurate in the strike zone. So he's mostly had some walks, with an occasional base hit, sprinkled with some strike outs. I think more than anything he just needs to gain his confidence back. Steve's planning some batting cages days with him and his work with pop fly catches is what probably helped land Andrew in this team-because he catches more pop flies than any other kid I've seen yet on the field.

On the flip side-if you want to see a great comedy act, go to one of Steve's softball games! It's like they were the inspiration for "Bad News Bears!" Only when they wrote the screenplay, they decided to play it down because Steve's team wouldn't be believable. It really is fun to watch though! All the guys are good hearted, and us wives can sit in the stands and cackle at them without hurt feelings in the end.

Thomas is doing great as well. His little personality shines through more and more each day-or should I say night? If I fall asleep and roll towards my stomach, he will start moving so much it wakes me up with my heart racing! He only likes when I lay on my right side, and if I vary from this position, he tells me immediately! I'm pretty confident that he's going through a very large growth spurt, because all I seem to be able to do is eat, sleep, and, and cry! Poor Steve. He's been such a champ throughout. I'm definitely not making it easy on him though! I guess I'm prepping him for those times when nothing we do will appease little man. Yeah...that's it..just warming him up...uh huh! :) Well, as they say, the first step is to admit you have a problem!

A Game For Us To Play!

A fellow pregnant friend recommended this game! I just filled it out, so now it's your turn..when do you think our little peanut will be born? Will he come close to his due date, like I'm hoping for, or do we have a little rebel without a cause on our hands?

Good luck!

They're Not Mine

Well, they are. For now. Just not forever.

I was watching all the kids today as I waited to pick up Andrew & Hannah from school. All different age ranges from the babies & toddlers, wrapped up in their mom's embrace, to the 1st graders, still fresh & excited about school, to the 5th graders, more interested in their surrounding friends & the social happenings of the world than much else anymore. Just then, Thomas kicked me, and my first instinct was to reach for my tummy, to rub it & tell him hello.

All of a sudden-may it be hormones, the chick in me, or the fact that I get to experience the miracle of life from it's very beginnings all over again, my heart welled up with a bittersweet sadness.

They start out, completely dependant for their every need. They rely on us to provide them with comfort, love, support, joy, and an unconditional promise to be there no matter what, at all costs, all the time. They look back to make sure we're there. Cry when we're not. Any time they experience a "first" they make sure we know about it. They come to us and tell us their thoughts, feelings, and worries in this world.

We scare monsters away with flashlights. We stroke their hair when they're sick. We speak reasurring words when feel their first rejection.

Then, all of a sudden-they feel it's not as necessary for us to be there at all hours. They forget to look back. They rely on friends as a source of comfort when things don't go right, and they admonish us when we try.

I know it will come back. Don't get me wrong. I know that they'll grow up and there will be times when they'll need me. When they'll need the comfort and safety of mom.

But my kids, no matter how much I call them "mine" are their own entities. Souls meant for paths I cannot always follow directly behind in. Their lives slowly becoming solely their own, and I'll be but a fan on the sidelines-silently cheering through their victories, and feeling their hurts when things don't go right.

I love watching them grow up, but I hate seeing them take those tentative steps towards the outer edges of the nest.

Hannah made her Girl Scout cookie selling goal!

This is Hannah's first year in Brownies, and she got the cookie order form a few weeks back. There was a hippie lunchbox that she set her heart on. Only problem was, it took 250 boxes to get the prize. Andrew, Steve, and I tried to let her down gently that she probably wouldn't be able to sell that many-especially at $4/box in this economy! In usual Hannah fashion, she decided to defy us all, and tonight we officially finished selling, to reach her goal at 253 boxes! YAAAAY ~ except for the fact that now we've got to go around delivering 253 boxes.

Andrew's been a real trooper as well, given the fact that he's had to follow his little sister around for the last few weeks as we went door to door. His complaining was pretty minimal, even for him! Thank goodness we have a big van, a sturdy wagon, and a b.b. gun to sling over our shoulder if anyone decides they don't wanna pay for their cookies! :)~

Baby Olympics

Although nobody else has felt him kick yet, Thomas is in full swing. I think he's preparing for a triatholon of some sort, or to become a kickboxer. The only problem is, if anybody sticks their hand on my belly, he stops. As soon as their hand moves off, he starts up again! Of course, nights are the most active of all for him. Guess I'm being trained also huh?! It's good though, because now he's falling into a routine, and I look forward to hearing from him every day. He's not so cramped that I can't adjust & get him in a good nook of my belly, but I can tell he's getting to that point. 17 more weeks! It's really starting to hit harder with each passing week. I can't wait to see his little face with his ten little toes, and his reaction to us when he recognizes who we are!

Ultrasound at 20 Weeks

Thomas's Ultrasound 2-5-2009

On the left you can see his foot, on the right, his leg!

And the moment we'd all been waiting for......verificiation of his "Bits & Pieces" Like the little arrow she added on there, just in case we couldn't tell!! That cracks me up!

Steve has some magical powers or something. Plus phenomenal savings galore!

So, I don't know what exactly causes this to happen but every time Steve comes home from work the whole house turns into a zoo..The birds start SCREECHING hello, the dog gets all goofy, wagging her butt, the kids start jumping all over the place (even the preteen "I'm to cool for school" one!) Now..and I'm not even joking...even if the house DOES manage to stay quiet-like if the kids are in bed & the birds put in the garage for the night)...Thomas starts doing this insane flips-backwards, forwards, kicking, bumping into everything.. Steve elicits this excitement every time he comes in the door! Really cute!

Some other updates..we've been extremely lucky finding great deals on this baby. I've been scouring Craigslist since we found out for sure that he's not wearing pink..the deals are AMAZING! I had decided that as far as cribs went, I'd find one used, and if it came with a mattress I'd more than likely toss that and only use the crib. However, I found a crib & mattress for $50 online..I went over there to the house and was completely shocked at what was before me. The crib was in PERFECT condition. In fact, any scratches found on it now are due to the fact that Hannah kept pulling pieces of the crib away from Andrew to "help" and kept bumping it (AAAAHHH). The dad had bought new wheels for it, b/c he didn't like the cheap plastic ones, and the mom threw in the mattress covers free with it. The mattress itself was mint condition-the little label on the mattress isn't even wrinkled. I asked them "Are you sure that a baby even slept in this" and quite embarrased, they admitted that their 19 month old probably slept in it a total of twice. Needless to say, I got home, checked out the mattress, and it was a Simmons. Excitedly, I looked it up online, and it retails for $350+ Intrigued at the cost of the mattress, I went on to find that the crib retails for around $230. Add on the fact that he bought the new wheels, and she threw in the mattress covers..add the tax, and we're looking at $670 worth of bed for FIFTY DOLLARS..that made my head spin. Needless to say, with their house being immaculate, the crib being worth more than I would have EVER paid, and the condition it was all stored in, I'm totally extatic.

The savings aren't just there, though. I've bought a swing from someone I know for $15, in perfect condition..a pack 'n play for $45 that was new, in the box, with plastic sealing the inside stuff, clothes for 50 cents a piece-some still with tags, and numerous other things that I can't believe I've found..

The kids are starting to get bored with the prospect of a new baby..but it'll be renewed as soon as they can feel him kicking. I'll write more later!

Our Family

How to introduce our family? There are 4 of us, plus one on the way. We are a blended family, and it has seemed to go really smoothly in the transition.
There's Steve..my husband. He's been the best stepdad a mom could ask for in her kid's life. He really understood how to become part of the family without trying to be that "daddy" figure, or force some sort of weird relationship on them. I truly appreciate the way he let them come to him when they were ready to show emotions.
Then there's me. I'm a stay at home mom right now. It's been tough, and we've had to make some sacrifices, but overall I wouldn't change anything about getting to be home with my kids. I love being the one to pick them up from school, sit with them when they need help with homework, and cook dinner with them right there.
Andrew is the oldest son. He's going to be 11 in March~and in Middle School next year! I can hardly believe it. He has me running around, between violin lessons, baseball practice, GATE, and the guitar lessons he takes at school! He's a really great son, with a huge heart. I truly believe that when he figures out what he wants to do with his life, it will be something involving helping others in a profound way.
Hannah's next in the little clan. She's 7 right now, and will be having her birthday in June, like this baby. She's a sweetheart, through and through. She's a piano playing Girl Scout these days. Her little group of friends are so cute together. It really reminds me of when I was a little girl. She's not very girly anymore..much more the tomboy these days. I don't think I could get her in a dress if I wanted to! She once asked me what the most important job in the world was, and I told her it must be a teacher, because no matter what you do in life, you need a teacher to have shown you the way first. Her direct response was "Well, then, I want to be a teacher!"
And last but not least, there's the little darling currently waiting for his grand entrance in June. His due date is the 23rd. He's already showing some personality & there are times when I just have to laugh at the things he jumps at! I'll keep you posted on his progress as we go along.